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Issues


College Freshmen
Issues With Which To Deal - Page 2

First, Enter A College
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About Your First Roommates 
  Many college freshmen have roommates with which they form friendships that last well beyond their college years. Not all freshmen are that lucky, however. In fact, many freshmen despise their roommates, their living habits, or both. A few try to work out their differences in a mature fashion...by setting "the rules," but this only creates more tension and a lack of at-home comfort. Some students pursue roommate counseling sessions but not every college offers such guidance. In a few cases, the situation becomes so bad that one roommate often ends up petitioning the school for a change of dorms but such is not always possible either. 
   It is impractical to think that all people of the world will always get along with each other no matter how easy-going they may be. If you've never shared a room with someone before, you're almost certainly going to find some "quirks" in the habits of your roommate with which you disagree or disapprove. Remember that no one is perfect and everyone is raised a little bit differently. The best advice we can offer is to practice tolerance. Your roommate might like to do dishes several hours after eating... or (s)he might be a "neat freak." But if you expect there to be some differences between the two of you... and if you tolerate any such basic differences you experience, you'll be a far better person..and a far better roommate. Rather than worrying if your roommate likes you-- try to find reasons to like your roommate. When you're worried about "improving" your roommate, consider whether or not you can improve yourself. It's far easier for YOU to make a change in YOU than to make one in someone else! But when drastic differences and problems caused by your roommate create health or study problems, be open, honest, and considerate in discussing them. Try to save outside meditation as a last resort as it may only create further tension between the two of you.  Don't ever engage in physical violence with a roommate: Many laws have been passed which put fighting with roommates under the criminal justice headings as "domestic violence" and penalties can be quite severe. Fighting simply isn't "stylish" anymore in college. Be mature and discuss your feelings openly.
   It is going to be far easier to find fault with your roommate than it will be to find any of their positive qualities. This is only human nature. Make a conscious effort to decide what you like about the person with which you live. And if you're in a situation where you just can't do that, remember: you're not going to have to be with that same roommate forever!  Most schools let students choose their own roommates after their first year ends. But during that first trying year, you're usually stuck with the "best match" they could find for you on paper. Alot of schools offer the opportunity to apply for a "solo dorm" but here at CollegeFreshmen.Net, we believe the disadvantages to living alone far outweigh any of the advantages -- especially for first year students. There are always worse things in life than a roommate you can't stand! Make the best of the situation and you'll come out a far better person in the end!


Recommended Reading : An interesting article on college roommates by the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel can be found here.. A more humorous look at the issue is posted at magorder.com and some more general advice on handling the social pressures of that first year of college can be found by clicking HERE!